TOTP 6/10/77 (tx 1/11/12): the king is dead

We've covered elements of this week already, as the Radio Times for this week featured this cover and a chat with some prime DJs. Noel wasn't amongst them, odd given he was the breakfast show host at the time. Maybe they thought as he was doing Swap Shop he'd be beneath them. In any case here he is with the show "you can have in any colour as long as it's black". So cue Henry Ford. Not really, La Belle Epoque. They like the music, they like the disco sound.

Ooh, look who's charted! Hope they're on soon!



Meco of previous post discussion fame gets the original drawn poster for Star Wars, dully.

Smokie – Needles And Pins
Feels like they're on every other week with something new, so obviously they'd be down to covers eventually. And roughly seventy seconds in audience member of the week is decided:



Imagine being on the bus to the studio wearing that. Even if it's made out of crepe paper it must still weigh a bit. Not that we're looking for distractions from this fairly straight and anaemic cover of the Searchers hit but VT have bought some new edit equipment in the week that creates rainbow-edged radial and diagonal wipes, the former used in conjunction with fish-eye and that through the bottom of a bottle effect we saw last time Smokie were on, probably not coincidentally. Alan Barton is the only member not on a riser. Certain issues?

The Emotions – Best Of My Love
A return to stealing from Soul Train's bins with all the actually dancing audience members that implies and in doing so shows up our lot somewhat. It's hard to decide who's best - a couple off stage left are doing a very kind of straight-legged foot-in-foot-out routine with both extending their arms out straight while somehow still touching fingers. A gent in a powder blue suit right at the front is bending from the waist. A man stage right is spinning every fourth step. The band meanwhile only take the mikes out of their stands just as they finish. Should have thought about that one.

Danny Mirror – I Remember Elvis Presley
Of course you do, he only died seven weeks ago and you've already been in the top 30 for three. Crooning Dutch grief hawker Danny, like so many, looks a bit like Keith Lemon by way of Mike Flowers, and is wearing a jacket with massive fringed bits and an immense number of shiny buttons on the shoulders with an Elvis T-shirt underneath. The audience are stunned into silence. Noel isn't stunned into silence by the demands of his job but from the way he glances over to the stage he looks about ready to say something.

Giorgio – From Here To Eternity
Noel suggests we get the Christmas decorations out, though what the one down Legs & Co are holding is clearly some sort of mass of shiny streamers. The reason I can't be any more accurate is the whole routine is in silhouette with a projected extreme close-up backdrop, which isn't really reflecting the futuristic nature of the record, electro years ahead of its time, and also fools those who look out for their favourite every week. One of them's Gill. Probably. They do look like they're giving it plenty in terms of energy and exuberance, it's just we can't tell for sure.

Yes – Wondrous Stories
Punk killed prog off in 1977, you know. A live performance video, Jon Anderson clad in an oversized dishcloth, most of the others in adapted Edwardian gear.

Deniece Williams – Baby, Baby My Love's All For You
A lovely lady, according to Noel. No staircase this time so she gets to move about, which for her means sticking one arm in the air and turning round. As the orchestra prove yet again they can ride a coach and horses right through disco if they so choose, sadly Hat Lady looks bored in a sea of interest, turning away from the stage when we catch her. Her friend is wearing a blue beret and what looks like the same top as Jon Anderson, oddly.

The Stranglers – No More Heroes
There's not even that much dry ice down JJ's side of the stage.

Baccara – Yes Sir I Can Boogie
Noel polls two interested ladies on how to pronounce what seems a fairly straightforward name, revealing some thought it was "Bacc-arer". "I thought it was the Osmonds meself!" chortles Noel to no reciprocation. They already did this once on the show and told you in the first verse too.

Steve Gibbons Band – Tupelo Mississippi Flash
Say this for Noel, he gets the audience involved, first chiding them on making noise around him and then sharing reading out the title duties with two women. It's another song about Elvis, one Gibbons, who somehow looks even more craggy than before, begins with some spoken word before falling into rock and roll line. The bassist is wearing a gas station cap and overalls, supposedly signifying trad working man identification. It probably isn't his own.

David Soul – Silver Lady
"Smile! Alright, don't overdo it" Noel commands a whole line of ladies, in his sharp suit looking briefly like a dressed down, swapped sexes version of the Parallel Lines cover. Soul wanders around as before, Leo Sayer sees us out, and in the middle a very strange moment with Noel and a single, unidentified older woman. "Now Kim, tell me about the brand new single you... oh, sorry, we don't have time, we'll find out about that later... she's livid, but it was only a joke. Bye bye." What? How? Why?

TOTP 21/7/77 (tx 22/8/12): everything changes

Last time we were gathered here there was a national sensation lurking. This (thanks to jamesonedin from Popscene) is a scan of a page from The Sex Pistols File by Ray Stevenson, published first in 1978, then in 1982, a scrapbook of a great deal written about the band at the time, the centrepiece of which is a mock-lurid telling of the night's events from Sounds magazine's Giovanni Dadomo, who also wrote for ZigZag and The Face, co-wrote a Damned single and fronted cult punks The Snivelling Shits.

The proper big TOTP news from the week is the appearance of one of the great holy grails of 60s British music - Pink Floyd, Syd inclusive, playback-performing See Emily Play on the Pops broadcast 6th July 1967 (if it's too ragged for you, a homemade remastering has been done) The footage has been known to exist initially in private hands - an unknown rock star's collection, it's said - for three years or so and was shown at Kaleidoscope in January 2010 but this is the first time it's slipped into the public domain.

And so to 1977, where the leonine face of DLT greets us and throws to... a song?

John Miles – Slow Down
Yes, now there's a hit to kick things off rather than the rundown. This changearound lasted one week. Shame, as John came in especially. This week's little things: the bassist wearing a tie with an open shirt, Miles' vocal adlibs being adhered to in miming but unfortunately well off mike, and Miles shutting his eyes as tight as David Parton did when a-talkboxing. Four people rush towards the throng just in time for the track's end, and as the camera pulls away we find DLT in full air guitar mode with the mike cord. "He-hey! Is that magic?" is his ungrammatic question. It's left to him to explain what's happened to the rundown, which he does via a completely wrong rendition of the opening riff that sounds more like the end of the Countdown clock timer, followed by the top 30 plus Tavares. Yes, for the next few years Top Of The Pops had no regular theme tune, just another chart hit jemmied in to accompany all the latest action shots:





Bay City Rollers – You Made Me Believe In Magic
And while we're on the changing of the ways, the Rollers final fling, both in the chart and on TOTP. Neither DLT nor the girls surrounding him, one arm in arm with him, another clearly trying to plant their palm on his bum, two clearly mothers with brilliantly northern stereotypical nan perms and bottle-bottom glasses, can truly summon up the excitement over it. There's not a stitch of tartan anywhere on the stage either, as if to show this is the new, mildly funky Rollers, not the ones you like. It's all looking very grown up until the camera gets to Eric Faulkner, who's chosen a leather jacket, rugby shorts and knee-high hooped socks. Nobody mixes styles that much and hopes to get away with it. There's a weird little tableau off to one side of the front of the stage too, where a man who looks like a burly policeman is looking disconsolately at the floor as everyone else does the side to side shuffle, a similarly catatonic if more attentive girl by both sides. Maybe they heard about the last bassist too.

Brotherhood Of Man – Angelo
"Here's a song that's going to do well in the charts, definitely". It's already number five! What more does DLT want? Repeat, anyway.

The Jam – All Around The World
Ah, this'll be a youth explosion, then. Well, maybe outside. Apart from less jumping around this time, either from Weller, Foxton or two blokes at the back, it's pretty similar to their debut showing, as committed young men in suits play power chords to a largely clueless crowd, still moving around just as they had five minutes earlier. Introducing the ways and means of TOTP directing to the new breed, Foxton's interjections in the middle are matched to a tight close-up of Weller. But there is a difference, as while there are a gaggle of people looking bored at the front stage left they're singing along, one directing it at his friend. He could look at the blokes right in front of him if he's that committed, surely.

Alessi – Oh Lori
"Some people from Ireland, say hello!" DLT's next line, or more precisely the bad accent it's delivered in, is sadly inevitable. Weeks after they participated in an awkward chat the brothers get to perform, and Bobby Alessi gets to show off his little bicycle-riding mime. We've kind of already seen the pair of them performing, albeit on video with one mike and a camera stuck on close-up, and pans, the sight of Bobby giving Billy unreciprocated matey looks and a small audience don't add much to the experience. That doesn't excuse the pair visible at the back of the stage having a chat.

Barry Biggs – Three Ring Circus
"In the same sort of vein", according to DLT. Barry's left his ringmaster gear and his mysterious sidekick at home this time, instead sitting down swaying, thinking that now just the song will do. Given the distance he misses the first note by, this isn't the case.

Smokie – It's Your Life
Perhaps as tired with the usual TOTP routine as the rest of us by now Chris Norman is dressed like a flamboyant flamenco dancer, if flamenco ever lent itself to the colour lemon. Not as tired of repeating themselves, the cameraman gets his bottom-of-a-bottle filter out again for the mid-section and waits for everyone to gather around one mike

Fleetwood Mac – Dreams
In what we shall now call the Supertramp Slot, about a minute and a half of grainy live footage - this, should you be interested - chiefly notable for Mick Fleetwood grimacing at the end of every bar and Stevie fiddling with a piece of material throughout.

The Rah Band – The Crunch
"After a good meal on a Thursday, what do you need? A crunch!" Makes about as much sense as the outfits. Repeat.

Danny Willians – Dancin' Easy
Panning over a phalanx of girls in white jackets we find Williams doing a David Dundas, rewriting an advertising jingle, in this case Martini's Anytime Anyplace Anywhere, for fun and profit. Williams had had a UK number one sixteen years previously (with Moon River) and so can be forgiven for being out of the soul style loop, but Huggy Bear's castoff jacket and big hat is not it. Gill tries to provide a distraction in a familiar looking all electric blue small top and flamenco skirt, which by the look of the punters confuses things even further for people already trying desperately to remember where the tune comes from. In fact, so easily distracted are a number of them that a couple openly wave to camera while a third does poses of largesse.

Queen – Good Old Fashioned Loverboy
Well, Queen weren't going to come back in again for the same song.

Donna Summer – I Feel Love
"I forecast it last week" says DLT, before his usual orgasm. Well, it's not like we can prove it. And now the show has a problem, because I Feel Love looks cemented to that top spot for a while and there's no video and no hope of Donna coming over to perform it, so here comes the first of at least four seperate Legs & Co-centric presentations. One can only hope the others are better reflective of its spacey disco rush than this one, in which the effort put into obtaining a rotating colour filter for mood lighting effects seems to outweigh that put into the routine, in which the girls shake their shoulders and wave the hem of their big long dresses a bit, looking more like they're trying to keep up with the BPM rather than do anything clever. Then they run from side to side a bit. Rosie gyrates her bosom at the camera a bit in a solo spot but coming some way into the routine it's literally a busted flush. The whole thing doesn't really reflect the erotic charge of the record, just when you want them to, catatonic as it may have made DLT. "I can assure you our playout group does not refer to Legs & Co - boney? Mmmm...." Over the credits again? Did Frank Farian have photos, just not quite enough? The designers are busy amusing themselves by using the colour filters against the kaleidoscope lenses. It just resembles a blur.

TOTP 7/7/77 (tx 1/8/12): when the two sevens clash

The Jimmy Savile auction took place in Leeds on Monday, to an apparently crammed auction house. The whole thing took the best part of thirteen hours and raised £320,000 or so for Jimmy's own charitable trust, £130,000 of which went on Jimmy's rare silver Rolls Royce Corniche convertible. As you'd expect there were some extraordinary lots among the 549 put up for sale, so before we start here's the Yes It's Number One big top ten, judged on oddness and over-estimate price:

A standard 'JIM FIXED IT FOR ME' aluminium badge - £2,000

The magic chair from the first two series of Jim'll Fix It - £8,500 (under the 10K estimate)

A blow-up of a newspaper's TV viewing figures column from February 1980, Jim'll Fix It at number one with 19.15m viewers - £65

A two-piece suit with an all-over print of Superman cartoon images, plus a pair of white leather platform shoes, worn when Jimmy met Prince Charles, Spike Milligan and Harry Secombe at the Royal Military Academy, Sandhurst - £1,600

A 60cm long machete on a green canvas belt - £140. SIR JIMMY SAVILE OWNED A MACHETE.

A crystal ball - £280

A Metropolitan Police helmet with 'To Jimmy Saville from Marylebone Police Station' written inside in ballpoint - £240

Four seperate sketches of Jimmy by Rolf Harris, two drawn in a TV canteen - total of £7,950

A mounted pebble with the engraved dedication 'By The People Of Keswick For Conquering Latrigg Fell' - £110.

This:



That's an actual Brazil nut, it says here. Not from the people of Keswick, that one. In fact, from one man. A Broadmoor patient - £150


Back in the real, linear world... well, that's a matter of opinion, really, as it's Tony presenting this week. Shot from below at the start, as he seemed to be most of the time.

The RAH Band – The Crunch
Now, this is how you start a pop programme, somewhere far beyond mere description. Spoiler alert for the start of this clip. Everything else alert for the rest. Even the drummer's in an open purple shirt and massive flares.



Look in the background at the start of the performance, there's three people getting down with their own selves away from the throng and next to someone else's drumkit. But really. Imagine in 1977 seeing this, hitherto unheard and certainly unseen, as the first song on, with no intro, on this great unifying family show, and eventually clocking how everyone else was turning out too. You'd wonder what the hell was going on. You'd likely wonder that in 2012. Tony openly admires the combined balaclava/gimp mask. "I must get one of those for David Hamilton". Aah, it's been a long time.

Olivia Newton-John – Sam
Aaaand back down to earth. This performance has been in this slot on three occasions and has never failed to bring down the mood.

Smokie – It's Your Life
The warmup man must have really been on it this week, the audience are moving more than we've seen then in months to these first two studio acts tonight. Quite the effort that seems too, as surely never mind Rorschach tests, the psyche would receive a good going over were candidates shown Smokie doing cod-reggae while two girls in zebra patterned plastic top hats look on. One man in shades and a leather jacket really isn't planning on moving when the camera sweeps past him, mind. Then the song takes a weird detour as a phasing effect leads not into a psychedelia section but a slow synth-led ballad middle eight by way of 10cc and seemingly shot through a pint glass. Did they think they really had to use that bit somewhere, never mind its context in the rest of the track? After that it's open season on keeping it together as three members, including bassist Terry Uttley looking like a perm/hippy haired Chris Barrie, gather by Chris Norman's position even though they all had perfectly good mikes of their own. Alan Silson, in a smart suit, puts one hand in his pocket - brazenly, the pocket towards camera - and the other on the back of Norman's neck. Then they start openly giggling for no good reason. Heady days.

Brotherhood Of Man – Angelo
Tony refers to BoM winning Eurovision "a couple of years back". It's as if he just doesn't care. As hardened Brotherhood watchers will know the moves don't change from performance to performance, but there is a telling moment when Nicky joins Sandra where they're nearly standing at right angles to each other. But this isn't like Abba at all, remember. Well, with the girls in pink golfing pullovers and the boys in gold jackets over black waistcoats it's not like they were aiming for a sartorial match. One man stands alone near the front in not moving, and while on camera looks across in the opposite direction, just in case. He's still there, immoveable as an Easter Island head, a chorus later. "One of those songs where you hear it and you just keep singing it over and over again" reckons Tony.

Bob Marley & The Wailers – Exodus
They're no Smokie. Repeat, on this of all days of Rasta/reggae importance.

Alessi – Oh Lori
"My very favourite record" says Tony, and we are accordingly prepared. A soft focus video, the brothers in close shot around one mike.

Barry Biggs – Three Ring Circus
Oh my. Barry, of course, we remember from his pink working men's club entertainer shirt from Sideshow, and now with the upgrade in travelling show he's graduated to the full ringmaster uniform. Big bow, stripy cummerbund, top hat, he's gone the whole hog. Coupled with his familiar striding back and forth stage style and his familiar light reggae beat it looks faintly unnerving, never mind uninviting. It's only on rewatching that things become weirder - like a spectral presence, a Pops Pipes, there's someone in a full leopard suit and spotted make-up sitting on the stage behind him. The camera never focuses on them or catches them in a full stage still shot, you just see them in passing two or three times, never clear enough even to work out a gender. What a liva bamba aie indeed.

Boney M – Ma Baker
I'm sure after Noel's mix-up last week Tony calls them "Bernie M". Legs & Co's go, and so soon after Mah Na Mah Na Sue gets the short straw again for the first in the group's occasional historical characters through disco-pop series, dolled up in decorative hat, big dress, grey wig and every so often swinging a handbag for all she's worth before heading into calisthenic dudgeon, the full jaunty pearly queen without the outfit routine high kicking, hands on hips, bravura expression. Do you reckon she had to get thoroughly pissed before recording to carry it off, a professional ballet-trained dancer like herself? I do. (Lawyer's note: I don't.) We see precious little of her indignity, as it's projected onto the back of a set they can't get to appear in shot whenever there's a close-up on what's happening in front of it. What's in front of it? The rest of Legs & Co in colour-coded jackets and big crinolene skirts thrusting, swaying and kicking over the back of chairs. It looks a little like a late replacement, in truth, what with very similar routines for each verse. Maybe Sue was having to make a 'mother dancing' routine up on the spot. That would be the respectful explanation.

Andy Gibb – I Just Wanna Be Your Everything
Gibb the younger with his rhythm guitar, his co-opted falsetto and his Radio 1 Roadshow bomber jacket again.

Hot Chocolate – So You Win Again
They do seem to be available a lot. Errol shows a little sign of movement to the groove this week, while sporting a medallion large enough to display in a museum and pass off as a Roman era discovery. Is that an extra member on keyboard pushed off to the side this week? Cutting the number one off literally on the first line of the last verse, evidently it getting even that far a surprise to Errol as he has his mouth shut and his mike far away from it, Tony invites us to join him on Summertime Special come Saturday and out pretty much in the same ballpark as we began, with a sound of the future that must have confused plenty at the time, Donna Summer's I Feel Love.

Next week's show... well, that's a story in itself.

TOTP 24/3/77 (tx 29/3/12): that big hair sound

Without wanting to turn this into another blog foregrounding the narrative of changing times in 1977, it's worth noting that on the 26th March 1977 ITV's self-consciously hipper (though it wasn't really, three weeks before the star guests had been Slade and Paul Nicholas) Pops rival Supersonic featured Mr Big, Racing Cars, Guys And Dolls, Roy Harper, Cliff Richard, Dennis Weaver and this:



According to iPlayer, if you like TOTP77 "you may also like Songs Of Praise". I'm saying nothing.

Dave Lee Travis in extreme close-up. Some things are not meant for family audiences.

Brendon – Gimme Some
Having spotted their true USP from their debut appearance, their rundown photo features the wedding suited bass-playing youth front and centre. For his studio return he's dressed down to grey shirt and jeans, safe in the knowledge that tonight he gets to play in front of a drummer who looks even younger, as Brendon and his Keegan hair kicks off with some good old-fashioned clapping above the head. Whether Brendon thought he hadn't made the most of his opportunity first time round I can't say but his shirt is even further open tonight and he's miming into and gripping onto the mike like it's a buoyancy aid, some achievement when that involves extemporising lines like "I need me some sugar and your love is tea". Meanwhile one of the guitarists gurns unpleasantly and plays like he's Johnny Ramone while sporting a Rubettes cap. Well, they weren't using them any more.

Elkie Brooks – Pearl's A Singer
DLT, resplendent in a red T-shirt with Marilyn Monroe pictorial design, introduces "the lovely Elkie Brook". In TOTP world she just hadn't qualified for surname plurality yet. Beside a stage prop that resembles a peacock lost in an autumnal hedgerow Elkie croons gainfully while her band in full dickie-bowed, ruffled shirt formal dress, including a guitarist the spit of Denis Law, do their slow, subtle thing, the bassist seemingly only requiring one finger. Even at supper club speed a marauding camera mows half the front row down. Luckily the tracking shot wasn't required when Elkie and band break into proper jazzy mode, heralded by a pianist with a perm that would have got him into any contemporary funk band, a glorious goatee hanging over the end of the chin and a cardigan that can't have cost more than 75p from a dubious flea market. You're on telly, man! As the Richard Stilgoe-alike on keyboard switches to lustfully swiped tambourine in-house backing singers the Ladybirds make a rare screen appearance, though they only get to sing one line while actually on screen. Them's the breaks.

Brotherhood Of Man – Oh Boy (The Mood I'm In)
DLT pretends to faint at the end of his link. The girls surrounding him find it amusing. Simpler times. The look this time is all over the shop, the blokes in white shirts and medallions both playing guitars because THEY'RE NOT LIKE ABBA, ALRIGHT?, the girls in matching white overalls. To them, this was sophistication. To the viewer, their decorators' van is ready to whisk them away to another job the moment recording finishes. One of them starts with one hand in her pocket. By the chorus they're standing at ninety degree angles to each other. Not seen that anywhere else.

Graham Parker & The Rumour – Hold Back The Night
But first DLT has an announcement. "A lot of you people watching at home this evening would be expecting to see David Soul... unfortunately he's had to rush back to the States... of course we will be trying very hard to get him for you in the near future". David Soul never appeared in person on Top Of The Pops. (Unless he turned up for a quick chat, but then the likelihood is he'd have been asked to record something while he was there, so it seems not) Meanwhile this is a repeat, and it's a good thing too as just to squeeze the show into a 30 minute slot this was edited down... to 73 seconds. Cheers for coming, Graham. All together now - it's an appearance as short as he is.

Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jnr – You Don’t Have To Be A Star (To Be In My Show)
"David Hamilton's theme tune" DLT claims. Oi, don't encroach on Tony's comedic patch! A video, or possibly a recording from an overseas programme, in which the couple sing their professional soul right at each other - well, they're a married couple - and we here note Davis looks like the surreal love child of Bo Selecta's Craig David mask and a negative of Tom Jones.

Dead End Kids – Have I The Right
DLT is flanked by two girls wearing T-shirts reading 'MOTORING UNIT BBC'. Nothing is explained, much less why one of them looks like the potential love child of Jimmy Savile and Laura Marling (who wasn't born for another thirteen years, so it's even more surprising) Dead End Kids is a tremendous '77 punk bandname, it's just it got swiped first by a band looking to fill the gap the Bay City Rollers (who they'd supported the previous year) hadn't quite left just yet - Scottish, young, delusions of rock chops. They ended up teen-glam after both concepts had long since left the frame of reference, which explains why they were one hit wonders. Singer Robbie Gray had clearly decided belts and braces was the look, making him look like a stereotypical 1970s football hooligan were it not for the night's latest voluminous perm. Throughout he holds a small mallet in his left hand, not for bludgeoning the front row if they look at him funny but for first banging against his thigh and then, when the time comes, for studiously 'playing' some tubular bells that continue being played after he's walked away following nine hits. That's the sort of thing that gets the teens running.

Smokie – Lay Back In The Arms Of Someone
As much as it seems they had a studio residency for these few months, this is merely a repeat.

Boney M – Sunny
"It's girlie time!" As usual when introducing Legs & Co DLT seems to be on the verge of doing himself a mischief, this time coupling his not quite comedic enough not to be convincing lasciviousness by proxy with a comedy northern accent. It even looks like he's making the male masturbatory gesture at the end. Still Gill-less, it's more standard hoofing in time is made in dresses possibly made from those strips of paper you get in kebab houses to seperate the counter and kitchen. Really it needs Bobby Farrell.

T-Rex – The Soul Of My Suit
We weren't to know it yet but this is the last we'd see of Marc Bolan on TOTP. He looks more imperial phase elfin-like then he did on his two 1976 showings but it's hard to tell which seems less fitting for prime Bolan, the yellow suit jacket or the keyboard player with a Scottish folkie beard, tracksuit top and Badly Drawn Boy hat. Once upon a time he'd have been given proper style pointers. Not to denigrate the whole thing, there's a fine crane shot from the back of the stage revealing both Dead End Kids' instruments still set up on the other stage and the actual paucity of audience numbers, and Bolan, still not yet (and indeed never) 30, has regained his charisma. He'd have been 65 this year. Imagine.

Manhattan Transfer – Chanson D'Amour
But before then DLT has special guests... The Captain & Tennille! What level of specialness this is is unclear as their biggest hit at this point had peaked at 28 and they wouldn't reach the top 40 again until 1979, but never mind, nice of them to drop in. The Captain has a captain's hat on and, bearing the permanently surprised look of latter day Brian Wilson. says he's on holiday "to look for a few captain's hats". Yeah, alright. Tennille's only contribution is to confirm that the pair got together in 1971, "a long time ago". Then it's the last week on top for this "magnificent piece of music" - his words - at number one, after which DLT does his piece on his knees claiming "a bezerk cameraman has attacked me". Not before time, if so. Sound And Vision, presently up to number three, again plays over the credits, and again the early edit cuts it off before the vocals.

TOTP 10/3/77 (tx 15/3/12): European harmony

"It's your weekly shot of rhythm and rock" enthuses Kid Jensen, which seems a very Americanised way of putting it, especially as in his white jacket and big collared stripy shirt he seems to be dressed as an airmail letter. There's a slow clearout process going on in the top 30, though Barry Biggs is still about, the best of the new pictures being the O'Jays looking like trainee gangsters.

Graham Parker & The Rumour – Hold Back The Night
Not punk yet, no, but pub rock's still pulling at populism's coat tails. Admittedly this is Parker's soul/Van Morrison leanings rather than wiry Feelgoods pub rock, but it's all heading somewhere. Seems slightly desperate to be covering this, though, the Trammps had only sent it to number five sixteen months earlier so there was no great call for him to be resuscitating a lost classic or family favourite. It doesn't help matters that Parker is wearing shades, is tiny (unless the Rumour's guitarists are all medical giants, which I doubt) and is doing a lot of double fist pumping before the vocals start. When he does start singing, he seems to have retroactively borrowed the voice of Craig Finn from The Hold Steady, despite being from a different continent. He's big on arm movements to exude the lyrics further, the title always, always getting the outstretched palm. And what is he mouthing during the bridge? Can't work out if it's proposed new lyrics, the sax or electric keyboard solo expressed through the larynx or trying to remind himself of how the next bit goes. "What an exciting debut!" Kid makes sure to exude.

The Real Thing – You’ll Never Know What You’re Missing
"What a good week it's been for Liverpool, what with John Conteh" I like the period detail, don't you? For the record he'd defended his WBC light-heavyweight title for the fourth and last time against one Len Hutchins with a third round TKO. You don't get boxers called Len Hutchins any more, do you? As well as doing a lot of smiling to himself Eddie's gone for Zapata moustache in the works and hairline headband, while his bandmates have gone to the usual lengths of the laundry basket - red T-shirt and dungarees, fringed jacket over bare chest and what seems to be a dark blue apron. Any port in no storm at all.

Brotherhood Of Man – Oh Boy (The Mood I'm In)
Kid calls theirs "a change in style" even though they barely had a style to begin with, they were one hit wonders to this point whose only proper idea was a twist ending. This is their British Abba (But With The Blokes Singing And Not Playing Instruments Or Being Much Use To Anyone) relaunch, checkered alternating outfit colours the style plus neckerchiefs for the women.

Smokie – Lay Back In The Arms Of Someone
At least Kid admits they're "always" on the show, but you can't say they're moving on in the same way as BoM. The bassist has bought himself white flares and a home perming kit on an apparent mission to look like a future 70s stereotype and Chris Norman's lapels might be made out of Axminster but otherwise it's earnest acoustic melodic rock all the way. Right at the end of what seems to be a truncated version everyone ignores the physical probabilities and tries to go back to back on the instrumental break. It doesn't really work. As Kid prepares to tell us "I think that's just about the best 45 they've ever made" we briefly see a black man in a fedora, shades and smart suit and tie with buttonhole white carnation, so . Had he turned up at the wrong address?

Barbara Dickson – Another Suitcase In Another Hall
Just to confuse modern viewers, and probably a lot of contemporary viewers too, Kid remarks on how Dickson "has come a long way since the days of John, Paul, George, Ringo... and Bert". Kid's in an easy to please mood, he states it's his favourite song from Evita, and just for him Barbara's brought her guitar to fill the instrumentation gap where the harp from the first performance went. Still nobody to sing the male part, which makes her look like she's throwing a strange voice at the very end.

The Rubettes – Baby I Know
"Last time I was on Top Of The Pops I introduced the new single from the Rubettes and I said it would get to number one. Well, it's not far off this week, it's at number eleven!" Kid follows this with the kind of fixed smile that one can only attain when one has said something of that leap of logical faith on prime-time national television of their own volition. One strange thing given we'll never need to hear this again soon, as much of a grower as it is (just me? Oh alright then) The Rubettes didn't change their sound and look overnight, the one time we saw them in 1976 they were heading in a country direction anyway, but nobody's told whoever was in charge of the chart rundown as it's still using a picture of the band in smart jackets and two, including front and centre Alan Williams, in cloth caps. Also there's still five of them pictured, which means someone's not paying attention. This is curtailed by the single worst cut-to-black edit in the whole run so they can keep in two songs that were on the last Pops while cutting out the week's, and maybe month's, most interesting newcomer to the running order. Why bother, eh?

Electric Light Orchestra – Rockaria
Video again, still no room for Jeff's specific vision on the Pops stage.

Mary McGregor – Torn Between Two Lovers
A Gill-less Legs & Co with rather too little literalism this week. No duality, no switching from one side/emotion to the other, no general expression of feeling like a fool, just a lot of twirling and crouching down in Quality Street wrapper dresses because the song is too slow to really do much with.

Brendon – Gimme Some
"If you go to discotheques regularly here's a tune you'll have undoubtedly been tapping your toes to recently". Kid, I don't think people go to discos to tap their toes. Just a friendly word of advice. Brendon, a man with a full Keegan perm, is clearly aimed at Stardust Club - International Singing Talent And Chicken In A Basket Served All Night rather than Wigan Casino, given his song is chiefly the title shouted over a watery glam beat. The well dressed theme of the night continues with the young bassist, who in contrast to the neatly patterned shirts of the guitarists must have been sent out by his mum as there's no good reason for him to don not just a grey suit but a matching waistcoat. Wouldn't be surprised to find he's got a pocket watch on a chain on him too. Our fedora'd friend, despite being right at the back, is really going for his dance moves.

Manhattan Transfer – Chanson D'Amour
Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta! "Manhattan Transfer Company", as Kid calls them for some reason, are on video, in costume and responsive to clearly canned applause after the first line. They've got a band with them, Laurel Masse ordering "play it, boys!" like a jazz singer with ambitions. Elton John's Crazy Water sees us out. Kid sees us off with an extravagant Going For Gold opening titles-like wave and - let's not let a single mention of this attempt at a catchphrase go unnoticed - "goodbye and good love".

EDIT NEWS: Lynsey De Paul & Mike Moran's Rock Bottom, maybe cut for being the longest song on the show and it will be on again but... I so wanted to see the reaction from the prime-time crowd to this. A year after Brotherhood Of Man brought the Eurovision party home, this back to back duelling piano jazz chords duet about working together against the failing economy - hey, timely too - was offered up as our continental representative. In its own way, this was as far from the pop mainstream as New Rose.

TOTP 6/1/77 (tx 6/1/12): ring in the new

1977 - the year of Evita, Keith Richards' drugs bust, Studio 54, Saturday Night Fever and punk breaking. Chris Martin, Kanye West, Ronan Keating, Shakira, Danger Mouse, Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance, Richard Archer of Hard-Fi and Claire from Steps were born. Elvis, Marc Bolan, Bing Crosby, Ronnie Van Zant and Maria Callas died. Also, not a single Top Of The Pops making it into the top 20 of the weekly TV ratings all year, something that didn't happen again until 1985. Truly the alpha and omega of an era, as we'll come to learn better together throughout 2012.

Oh god. This goes on all year.

No need to take too long discussing The Story Of 1977, except it's an odd form of marketing to preview a series which runs all year in prime time with an hour long trailer telling you nearly all of it is shit until punk arrives and changes everything (which obviously explains why Mull Of Kintyre, released in November, became the best selling single of the whole decade), making sure first to tell you you wasted your time over the previous eight months watching the previous year's output being rerun. Too much block revisionist history (1977 was a relatively calmed year in terms of inflation, unemployment and strikes, certainly nothing like the three day week of 1974 or the Winter Of Discontent of 1978) and plain deliberate ignorance of Pops' role - it's a family entertainment show based on the biggest selling records of the day (or in Story Of terms the old guard "clinging on"), not a rival to So It Goes - to discuss, but whoever got the reliably rotten Sue Perkins to claim the bulk of its guests "were all novelty acts" over a clip of Jonathan Richman needs taking far away from a place of pop culture influence.

Anyway. Here it is on iPlayer for the next week and another couple beyond that due to repeats, and if you don't mind spoilers here's Big Hits 1977.

So what had BBC4 got to offer the part-timers, those making a night of it who'll forget about the rest of the run and mildly irk those of who sat through Glamourpuss to get to this moment, godammit? Unusually we start with the rundown followed by the first surviving appearance of Kid Jensen - that's how he's referred to in the credits, so like Floyd/Floid that's only how this blog will refer to him - who remarks that there just wasn't a new chart published that week. Actually there was, and one of those you're about to see was on the way down. Boo, TOTP. BOO. Also, John Christie had entered the top 30. It happened, ladies and gentlemen, though he immediately started falling so the temptation to call him back in was averted. And it's with that inaccuracy ringing in our ears we embark upon the pint/quart activity of cramming eleven songs and a playout into 35 minutes.

Sheer Elegance – Dance The Night Away
And here's how to get a new year off to a flyer. This would be Sheer Elegance's last appearance, which is a shame as they've finally learnt the value of not colour clashing in alarming ways. Not that this getup isn't alarming by itself, as the red shirts with large white patch and ruffled plunging neckline are augmented by white trousers so tight Cliff Richard would wince. The hook this time is classically soulful but limited by only having one really able member the trio were never destined as anything other than a footnote, especially given the not inconsiderable US competition on the same show.

10cc – The Things We Do For Love
Without a link - no idea whether by cut or design - we're into a video shot in an overspotlit performance space of a band we last saw on the second BBC4 show of 1976. Some nice close-ups of some tambourines at one point. "Broken up but not down" Jensen points out, this being their first single without Godley or Creme.

Tina Charles – Dr Love
"A real disco delight" Kid calls it, which can only mean another singer held hostage by the orchestra's overemphasis. Actually despite the ever eager trombones they're getting the hang of the rhythm, largely through so much practice you'd imagine, and Charles is in full voice. She's also in full figure, not unreasonably given she was four months pregnant, but the cumulative effect of the lack of movement and the large kaftan means the audience are having to provide the movement visuals for her. Dr Love seems to be a similar type to Dr Kiss Kiss. Maybe they're related.

Smokie – Living Next Door To Alice
Stop that. "The pride of Bradford" - Kid's not entirely comfortable in his early Pops days, but he knows the value of a brief description - have invested in a lightbox with their name on. It finally adds something to their stage presence, though it's undeniable that Chris Norman's hair is lustrous, shiny and full of vitality more than ever. Definite extra Rod Stewart tinge to his vocals too.

Gladys Knight and the Pips – Nobody But You
Interesting staging here, as the orchestra, all in orange shirts, are visible behind Jensen during his introduction. For her own protection from the British winter Gladys is sporting a lurid green scarf over her red top. Three minutes later, an indication of why all British cod-soul should just give up on the spot, and with the Pips in matching grey jackets and light blue trousers the male groups could learn a lot too. The audience are unsure whether to look on in envy or jig about slightly to the gospel tune. "Didn't I tell you we had a special show?" Jensen appraises, though the appreciation is dimmed by the thought presenters say something like that every week.

Jethro Tull – Ring Out Solstice Bells
Very appropriate that the last of the Christmas songs would be shown on Twelfth Night. Jensen calls them "unpredictable", something immediately undercut by this being a repeat.

David Soul – Don’t Give Up On Us
"I think this next sound will be the next big number one" A correct prediction! A Top Of The Pops presenter got a chart prediction right! Stopped clock being right twice a day and all that, but see, it's the youth that really know the chart score. As big as this was there's some awkwardness around its presentation as Soul never came over to promote it, nor indeed any of his other 1977 hits. Legs & Co are thus pressed into service in their nighties for a routine based around a large circle, maybe based on Soul's assertion "it's written in the moonlight". Before long the early tactic of lying, standing and running about in a circle is abandoned in favour of the usual formation emoting for a couple of minutes until all six gather back in a circle to get down on their elbows and, through the faerie majick of CSO, admire a picture of Soul himself. Phh. Never gave Bill Nelson of Be Bop Deluxe that extra treatment.

The Drifters – You’re More Than A Number In My Little Red Book
On video and amid a misty studio setting, this week's Drifters do their supercharged cabaret suit routine.

Clodagh Rodgers – Save Me
"A sound that's got all the ingredients for success" is as maybe, but Rodgers has found an extra pitch in the shape of a dress with a spectacularly plunging neckline. Twenty-plus years ahead of her fashion time, maybe. And maybe it's to distract from the song, which sounds like Smokie on their fag break.

Boney M – Daddy Cool
Now then. Boney M becoming huge European stars is attributed to this late 1976 performance on Germany's Musikladen, where young people who'd never seen such wild movement and outfits went mad for the single release. So they get to Pops and are told they have to either re-record the song without Frank Farian or sing live over the orchestra's rendition. Ah.



First thing you'll notice is Bobby Farrell trying not to panic too much that people might discover it was Frank Farian rather than him providing the vocals on the recording. He sounds nothing like himself, essentially. In turn the girls' lack of harmony practice is also shown, someone definitely singing flat, and the die is cast. The dancing and synchronised movements can't be as energetic since they have to retain some energy for the singing, and they've been put on a tiny stage with people behind them as well as in front. Before the singing proper has started Farrell has already nearly fallen off the back, severely limiting his wild abandon potential. The sequence at 1:40, where Farrell either forgets the words or is embarking on an emergency self-regulation attempt. Checking the recording there doesn't appear to be a mariachi section in the equivalent moment at 2:26 (it's actually strings, big drums and one trumpet in the middle), but put that down to the arranging invention of Johnny Pearson. Just after that, presumably covering for the heavy breathing bit as there's kids watching, Farrell is required to fill for an English speaking audience requiring all the bi-linguality he knows. He doesn't do it very well. We don't see them right after finishing. They might well have run away. The woman next to Jensen (his evaluation: "something new and different". Yeah, you could say that) at the end is a visiting Donna Summer, whose interview requirements are to name her new single, thank Jensen for his happy new year welcome and introduce...

Johnny Mathis – When A Child Is Born
Mathis is still in his jungle hideaway for one more week. Money Money Money is the credits playout, Jensen's final words being "Goodbye and good love!" Um, if you like.

TOTP 7/10/76 (tx 20/10/11) open thread

Hello. This is little known Top Of The Pops retro blog Yes It's Number One. We're not here right now, we're about 150 miles away from our computer. If you see a man who seems deprived of fresh air sidling up to strangers and going "...but a month after they joined, you see, Dee Dee decided to retire through injury so they were back down to five with just the one original member left...", do say hello.

Of course, being away on a Thursday presents a huge problem, which is why I'm trading on the success of the comments box community and letting you fill in and make the sarky remarks this week. Using YouTube and assuming they don't put the wrong one on, here's a quick guide to what you can expect **SPOILERS**:

- Jimmy Savile in a Union Jack/Flag coat
- One of T Rex in his pyjamas and Marc in too much eye makeup
- Pussycat looking less scary than their picture suggests
- Rick Dees - on video! Plus the odd clip of becostumed Ruby Flipper as padding
- England Dan and John Ford Coley in a village hall
- Sir Jim with some sailors. Again
- The Detroit Spinners as frantically Flippered
- A huge bloke from BBC Radio Medway
- The Manhattans, of which there isn't that much to say (apart from according to one YouTube upload the band didn't have a copy of the shown video)
- Paul Nicholas' difficult second single, still with the bowler, this time with Sue and Lulu as distraction. Everybody cheerin', nobody steerin'
- a new appearance by Smokie, being amused and gurning in their own ways
- Yeah, ABBA again
- But no Manfred Mann's Earth Band.

Go ahead, then, and I'll see you late Monday or so in the comments and then properly back to recap business next Thursday (with an Alternative Canon in the middle). Also, can anyone in the meantime point to evidence that suggests these will continue into 1977? A lot of people seem convinced it's been confirmed but I don't know of hard say-so.

TOTP 23/9/76 (tx 29/9/11): duck and cover

Relevant information: Pan's People And TOTP Dance Troupes will have an interview with Lulu of Ruby Flipper (and at that time she was only 16! Some of you are feeling a little embarrassed now, admit it) and Legs & Co up some time in October.

Tony Blackburn back in charge this week, and there's suspicious amounts of blank space around him in the frame... and it turns out it's another "crikey, Nicey's just read my mind!" moment as Tony pretends to forget the title again, only this time it's not himself reminding him in the speech bubble, it's Noel direct from the wiped show in a suit with a purple and orange tie going through the title one word at a time. Tony's sense of achievement upon realising is not palpable.

Elton and Kiki are already down to 26, the record buying public certainly wiping their hands of that whole mess as quickly as possible. One new entry seems to be just represented by a shaped blur, but we'll come back to that one.

Smokie – I'll Meet You At Midnight
There's one heroic orchestral figure with which to start. In front of an audience including a woman in an Uncle Sam hat and her friend who looks quite a bit like Lulu Flipper and nearly takes a highyl visible tumble, Chris Norman makes love with his eyes to a wandering camera crane before a sudden lighting change reveals - egads - a man with a double-necked guitar! Norman's full throated post-Rod growl and some sterling work by Johnny Pearson's men elevate it from being just another MOR strummer song type, as I suppose does the oddly French textural lyricism, and the audience seem as keen as they ever could be, though a crane swing round reveals much of the front of the stage is taken up by a big camera, reflecting the stage lighting uncomfortably, which might be why it gets turned down for dramatic effect too early meaning our show-off guitarist is in the shade for a whole verse and pre-chorus. Next to it a girl in a lime green coat and what seems to be a cut down version of Noddy Holder's hat stares listlessly at the back of the redeveloped stage. Maybe it was she that nicked all the mirrors. It's one of Tony's favourite songs at the moment, apparently.

The Wurzels – I Am A Cider Drinker
"A nice half-pint of that lovely scrumpy they call cider"? Cider's not an obscure term, Tony - in fact if anything the concept of scrumpy is more parochial to the Zummerzet set. And what's with the undersizing of portions? Same performance as last week, not cut to so many ribbons this time, and it allows us to consider a) whether, after Drink Up Thy Zider, whether the Wurzels doth protest too much, and b) when these were shown in Germany a couple of years ago what must that populace have thought of us?

Kiki Dee – Loving And Free
"We're going to change the mood somewhat right now, very dramatically in fact". Well, that's one way past the impossible link when you don't have Jim's indefatigable resources of bringing working men and women on as props or Noel's free associating style. Although Kiki's in the studio once more she's still sitting primly upon a high stool, and through the turned down lights we can make out, not an audience or anything so prosaic, but the return of the wedding cake tiers. Electric blue eyeshadow, overlaid candle flames, you can't say they're not trying to breathe active life into the performance.

Bay City Rollers – I Only Wanna Be With You
Tony drags the most nervously monosyllabic girl he can find on screen to exchange pleasant badinage on the basis that she and her friend have attached tinsel to their berets, which are of course "sensational" in Blackburn Land. The song Tony refers to as "I Only Wanna Be, of course, With You" is in video form, where we get to observe Les mistaking gurning, shoulder movement and an open shirt for charm and a fresh outbreak of tartan.

Rod Stewart – Sailing
Speaking of overwhelming Scottishness aforefront... Sailing had been number one just the previous September but was being as the theme to Sailor, a BBC documentary about the Ark Royal. There were people who missed its four weeks on top in 1975 but suddenly caught on a year later? Enough to take it to number three, in fact, though last week (as in the week before original broadcast) The Killing Of George FamNO, DAVID had been to number two so everyone won all round. But mostly Rod. Tony has the two hat girls up with him and they really don't know where to look. Rod looks like an older Noel Fielding at a Wurzel Gummidge fancy dress party and the camera doesn't cut away from a head and shoulders close-up of him for a full fifty seconds. It's hypnotising. Then millions of swaying children gradually join in on choral BVs. Eventually a serious outbreak of arm swaying takes hold leaving Rod eventually crouched on the floor, spent and craven. It's like Emu's Pink Windmill Show had a budget upgrade (and, erm, a loss of Rod, Emu and Grotbags. Work with me here.) Would it be churlish to mention most of one whole section is swaying their arms in the opposite direction to everybody else? *thinks* No. Tony makes sure to mention Sailor is on at 9.25 tonight on this channel. No it isn't.

Rick Dees & His Cast Of Idiots – Disco Duck
You'd, erm, better just watch this. Floyd must have lived next door to a single magpie farm.



If ever a routine promised one thing at outset (close-ups of Sue's waggling arse) and delivered another (some people in big impressionistic duck suits) it was this, though I can't imagine Floyd was particularly keen on that design of waistcoat. He's getting the chance to display his swagger move set, though, gets a good few seconds of full-on solo work like he'd never had or have again after becoming human once again and he even gets to mouth along to the words as part of his choreography. Floyd was only 17 then as well, until that moment it's like everything he's worked towards. Look how nonplussed the audience are at the costume change. Observe how studiously his fellow dancers ignore the presence of the large cloth beast (except, needless to say, Cherry, who at 1:31 is definitely looking up at something and failing to stifle a grin, which might explain why she's missing from the wide group shot eight seconds later) Note from 1:17 that Philip is still miming along to the words. And cry. Cry for the lost hope of the optimistic young television dancer and the patience of the exalted choreographer who once believed in her charges. Is that Floyd himself in the costume? Is that the respective Flipperers in those costumes? Were they assigned one each if so or was it just who got to the pile first? What the fuck is Tony doing at the end? We might never know.

'Disco Duck' was trending on Twitter half an hour after the show finished. Our work here is done.

Manfred Mann's Earth Band – Blinded By The Light
Ah. A return to earthier stuff, if you'll forgive the phrase. Before then, Tony re-emerges in his own dry ice holding an oversized egg ("someone said I should go to work on an egg. You can definitely tell pantomime season is approaching"), never quite recovering his composure. A different performance this week, where one clever shot has Chris Thompson and Mann delivering their lines across each other in the same still shot. Thompson is meanwhile dressed more sedately, unless you count the big purple hat and the visible yellow T-shirt with a big red S on like a six year old attempting a customised Superman kit. There's no close-ups of the drummer so we don't get to tell whether he's wearing a Benny-style woolly hat or a Basil Fawlty-style big head bandage.

The Drifters – Every Night's A Saturday Night With You
Trouble with showbiz professionals drilled to within an inch of their corresponding life is there's not all that much to say about them once the fact all four Drifters are wearing yellow trousers, which seems to have been a popular colour amongst the 1976 soul community, has been taken in. Take heed, The Real Thing, these people talked to each other about their styling for big television occasions. Meanwhile an errant cameraman has evidently blazed an unnecessary trail given the big gap between groups of audience members right at the front with not even a wire visible between them. No wonder quite a few are now looking out specifically for maurading EMIs.

ABBA – Dancing Queen
"The show tonight is rather like David Hamilton - a little shorter than usual". Couldn't get through the whole thing without one, could he? And of course that line doesn't work, not when the last TOTP we saw was the same length, and not in a slot where they're all this length, and David Hamilton has always been the height he is. He should have thought ahead 35 years for such anachronistic eventualities, should Tony. Wisely Tony says goodbye before the song this time, which is the Australian performance again. See the way Anni-Frid plays fast and loose with the concept of choreography. By the end of the second chorus it's abundantly clear she missed her true calling as the Swedish Alf Ippititimus.

15/4/76: even though it's only number three

Ah, Dave Lee Travis. A man to whom history has not been kind, but then contemporaneousness wasn't particularly kind to him either. Pre-Cornflake, pre-snooker, pre-quacking quacking oopsing, his what would now be drivetime show laboured under the title 'It's DLT OK!' as if his desire to find an audience through innovation had hit a brick wall and he only had the power of his name to go on. Here he is indulging in one of his loves, aside from editoralising and laughing, in 1979, feeling proud about launching DJ race days and introduced by a film of last week's host when he looked slightly different. They hated each other, you know.



The dewey-eyed promo still of Tina Charles in the rundown gets us every time.

Fox – S-S-S-Single Bed
As if to predict what would have been the breakout viral success of repeat week one, even though it's only just entered the top 20 we get this for a kickoff. As an extra bonus, as the camera pans to Noosha's good side - and in this performance she really works the sideways looks - you can see DLT in the background poised as if still waiting for his cue. He is jigging on the spot. Amid such seductiveness the talkbox solo still sounds completely out of place, let alone that it's delivered by a man in a David Soul brown cardigan through a Peter Frampton-like plastic tube. Two women in matching brown Homburgs sway in time at the front. Maybe they're waiting for Pan's People to do Jungle Rock again.

The Stylistics – Can’t Help Falling In Love
A Philly soul cover of the Elvis standard shorn of quite a bit of its unison twirling style by the glaring fact one of them's sitting sideways on a stool, looking quite put out at the bits he'd otherwise be joining in with. Russell Thompkins Jr's almost constant thousand yard stare is a thing of... no, not beauty, the opposite. DLT calls it a "super new sound". He doesn't explain the seatedness. It's like a less spectacular version of the Tams fiasco.



Diana Ross – Theme From Mahogany
Not the age of the train promo clip from a fortnight past but Pan's People in outfits seemingly comprised of ruffs and silk twirling around big boxes and a tree with no leaves. They can handle the tempo, the meaning of the words less so. DLT's outro suggests he immediately wants to sodomise them all. Wonder if they reciprocated the notion.

Brass Construction – Movin'
The Funk in evidence, as are the requisite gold and otherwise reflective suits and about a million members. Only on film, which saves the BBC orchestra a job.

Sailor – Girls Girls Girls
Nickelodeon news! Since beholding the majesty of Richard O'Sullivanagram Georg Kajanus' specially made dual sided keyboard collection last time out, we find there's an entire page devoted to its construction and design developments, and they wrote a song about it (if you're like us you'll get an advert for Natalia Kills before the clip starts, and you may like to wonder if we've really come on that far as a species) By the way, they're still going, though in a unique twist with all the original members except the singer.

Isaac Hayes – Disco Connection
Pan's People, for all the opportunity to wear crop tops and short skirts, rarely looked at home with disco, where moves are led by the soul rather than a flailing Flick Colby. No Hayes vocals on this, bar some low growling, but some cracking Stax strings and only the merest hint of slap bass.

Smokie – Wild Wild Angels
"A consistently good sounding group" is the nearest Travis can get to all-out promotion all night, and he even has to spit that out. Their workaday northern club take on freeway rock is enlivened no end by a woman dressed for Little House On The Prairie, wide brimmed hat and all, dancing at the back of the stage with a book in her hand. Maybe she'd come to clean the studio from the evil spirits. The singer tries soul growling. He fails. This didn't chart, by the way.

Eric Carmen – All By Myself
"1976 is definitely the year of the big production numbers" Dave tells us, and the proprietors of a hip King's Road boutique snigger. You can tell there's been an edit in recording as the same big-brimmed lady is still strutting her careful stuff in the same place, though she's put her book down. Actually, unless they were recording two at a time and taking wild guesses with the chart placings Carmen has come back to deliver his local radio Smoochy Love Line Hour staple in the same clothes he wore when bothering Noel last week, right down to the openness of his blue working man's shirt. Like John Miles, it feels like it lasts for hours.

Brotherhood Of Man – Save Your Kisses For Me
For the fourth of six weeks at number one not the studio performance, or the Eurovision appearance, but some sort of video filmed in a very 70s slightly brown filter. All they actually do for the expense is wander through Holland Park, first in a line, then behind small fences pointing at things. The chorus gets a slow pan across some flowers and later a peacock in profile. It doesn't really reflect the song.

And we finish over some studio lights with Rodger Collins' You Sexy Sugar Plum, a funk pop jam in search of a dynamic chorus.

EDIT NEWS: As previously discussed this is the first of the 40 minute shows edited down - quite well, as it happens - to fit a neat half hour, so we lost Get Back - just the Apple roof footage you've probably seen in all its shambolic nature - The Three Degrees' undistinguishedly slow "brand new sound" (another one?) A Toast Of Love (though they're styled about twenty years ahead of their time), to which DLT gallantly suggests "they can singe my toast any time", and Silver Convention's Get Up And Boogie, disco trying far too hard to groove and accompanied by 1930s cartoons that fail to explain why in their chart still the three female singers are crouching down with their hands on their knees.